A Farewell
We are so thankful to have been a part of the tapestry of Buffalo, NY, media these last 6 years.
We are so thankful to have been a part of the tapestry of Buffalo, NY, media these last 6 years.
Honestly, I’m afraid to CHANGE right before the (somewhat-to-likely) disapproving eyes of my coworkers, teachers, and especially parents.
Should I let him go so he can go have babies with someone else? Should I just suck it up and have a baby? Why can’t I just want this?
I feel like I broke this piece of our relationship and I want so badly to fix it, but he won’t meet me there.
As a white woman who was once caught off-guard by her own unexpected privilege, I wanted to share what I learned and guide you through this new phase in your life.
For someone who writes words for a living… living and working through this pandemic so far has left me speechless.
NOMaste creator & writer Lara Martini took a little quaran-time this week to put together the ULTIMATE to-do list for us, and we are Here. For. It. It turns out, there are TONS of things to do in the coming weeks (and MONTHS!?) while we protect ourselves and our loved ones from society’s biggest medical catastrophe of the current era. Stay home, stay safe, and get some sh!t accomplished. No time like the present.
I love this human being so much, but I can’t deal.
I’ve heard some of them call me manipulative or judgmental, but I was really just trying to get them to snap out of it.
My question is – is someone like that really able to change?
I really like her, but I don’t know how to approach this.
It’s so difficult to watch someone you care about shrink away and isolate themselves, not fully understanding what’s happening.
I don’t want to quit prematurely, but I don’t know how much longer I can do this.
I don’t want to argue, or fight, or pretend things are okay when they’re not. I want out.
I thought I enjoyed helping people, but now I’m concerned that I was only doing this out of my own codependency and that all of my efforts were really self-serving in the long run.
My boyfriend and I have lived together for almost a year now, and let’s just say it’s not going well. It seems like we fight constantly about chores and who does what.
We’re not struggling and even do well financially, but money comes up almost daily, usually in the form of a lecture or berating me.
Lara & Alana venture down to Allen Street to try all of the desserts at Mundy Cakes. An onslaught of pure jealousy ensues.
Whenever I am around my mother, she spends the entire time on her phone.
When my parents were my age, they were well-established and a lot more stable than I am now. For a while, I was on the same path, but in my late 20s everything kind of fell apart.
Lara & Alana spend a fun-fueled day inside Buffalo’s own yokocho alley, Misuta Chow’s.
I’m seeing a man who is stuck in a relationship that is so entwined with his friends and living situation that we just pretend that part of his life doesn’t exist.
Join Afura and Ashera as they try to hold their prosecco and muse about the energetic effects of the darkest time of year, the varying intensity of divination techniques, and the power of religious iconography in an eclectic witchcraft practice.
I hate my friend’s boyfriend.
I’m afraid to masturbate because I worry I’ll think of my emotionally painful last relationship.
A little over a month ago, I ended things with a woman I’d been seeing. There were many reasons as to why, but most of them fall under the “I don’t like how you treat me” umbrella.
I’ve noticed that some of my friends seem to bounce from one relationship to the next, often with no time in between. I’ve asked the more serious offenders about this, and they never really seem to know why they do this.
A very happy Thxgvng to you, from the gang at QC x NOMaste!
I have an issue that’s not about sex or relationships, but it’s still confusing and I’m hoping you can help.
Join Afura and Ashera this Halloween, as they carve pumpkins and talk correspondences and fun ways to honor ancestors and the wheel of the year.
We haven’t talked about anything inappropriate at all, but there’s still something that feels a little off about this whole thing.
While I’m proud of myself for making ME a priority, I feel really guilty and like I’m a bad friend.
I’m not sure, but I think I my partner may be gaslighting me.
After what was a tumultuous better part of this past year, my primary partner and I have chosen to go our separate ways.
Recently I engaged in a bit of casual sex, and the casual in the casual sex took an unexpected turn.
In this month’s episode of Qween of Cups TV, Ashera and Afura interview Jamie Doktor, the goddess behind Buffalo Burlesque Studio and the Buffalo Stripteasers.
“Owning your beauty is important. We only get one body to live in, and we experience all pleasure and pain through this vessel.”
Recently my girlfriend went in for a standard check-up and was diagnosed with an STI. Neither of us have ever had any symptoms, and now I can’t help but worry that she’s been cheating on me.
The galz of #METTLE team up for this month’s TUESDAY TUNEZDAY jamlist.
In this week’s Smash Talks, Smashera addresses a reader who’s falling fast for a co-worker and friend.
In this week’s Smash Talks, Smashera addresses a reader’s concerns about her anxious-avoidant relationship, and how to keep the love flowin’.
Be Steadwell, The Internet, John Mayer, Taylor Swift, Kid Cudi, & the Yeezy Season 2018 Summer Collection round out this month’s installment of Tuesday Tunezday.
On this month’s edition of Qween of Cups, Afura and Ashera tackle sex and gender energy in magic and using the menstrual cycle to time your intentions. All this while drinking margaritas.
Is there a way to explore this that will keep me safe physically and emotionally?
On the first Tuesday of every month, QC will share what we’ve been jamming to lately.
I don’t want to drag this out, I just want to be done with it. How do I really break up for good?
Qween City is proud to present the debut episode of the Qween Of Cups talk show, your one-stop shop for all things occult. Join Afura and Ashera as they discuss the wheel of the year, mercury retrograde, and struggle to open champagne.
Jill Gedra gives us a top ten list of amazing food moments and activities to strive for in a food life well lived.
The Prettiots, Kelli Schaefer, Rihanna, Ana Tijoux, AmaLee, Hayley Heynderickx, and Class Warfare round out this month’s installment of Tuesday Tunezday.
“How do you stop loving someone who is abusive?”
It’s been a LONG time since I’ve been in this stage of a relationship or courtship or whatever and I don’t know what’s going on.
The QC staff shares their latest jamtunez; check out the new monthly installment Tunezday to get your groove on with new and old faves.
Smashera gets out of town and finds self-care in the process.
I have recently come to the realization that all of the important decisions in my life have been dictated by others.
Every time he gets involved with someone, a big part of me wants to warn them about him but I don’t know how.
Am I just a walking pair of wandering, fantasizing eyes?
Aniko Marshall gives us a list of goodies that has us salivating this week.
Recently, I found out that my ex is dating someone else and knowing this has opened up all the pain again.
I want to be with them, but I don’t want to marry them.
A while back I found out that a friend of mine cheated on his girlfriend.
I really don’t want to lose this friendship, but I also don’t know how to talk to them about it or make it not awkward.
A part of me really just wants to see him, but I know that no matter what, this is going to hurt.
I recently discovered that an ex of my boyfriend’s reached out to him in a definitely flirtatious 1000% non-platonic message. He doesn’t know that I know about it, and I’m furious.
My ex won’t stop blowing up my shit. Do I have any options other than blocking him to get him to chill?
I’ve abstained from sex and dating for about a year now. I had to take myself out of game to spend time healing and growing from the whirlwind of experiences I endured last year.
For some reason, though, as soon as I really get attached to them, they end up pulling away and I’m left heartbroken.
I’ve looked online a bit, but I often get overwhelmed and just end up closing the tab after thinking, “where does that even go??”
After years of dating and failed relationships, I’ve been able to narrow down what is potentially my greatest flaw: jealousy.
He says that it was only a few times and that it didn’t mean anything, but I’m devastated.
Or will a blood clot really form in my leg and shoot straight to my lung b/c I don’t wanna have babiez like, ever!?
What kills me is how much I loved him and thought that I needed him, so I ended up giving up a lot for him.
This is super gross and I’m sorry, but is squirting real?
So, for as long as I can remember, I’ve always wanted to have sex in the water. I want to try shower sex or sex in a hot tub. Stuff like that.
Lately, a lot more people have been asking me in person and online about getting tested, mostly because of a (now falsified) article that named Buffalo as the “most dangerous city for online dating.”
How do I get kinky? I just want to get kinky!
He acts like he can’t do basic tasks or function at all without me and tells me that he cries himself to sleep…
When is it time to be more intimate in a relationship? By intimate, I mean: when do you fart, burp, etc.?
I’m about a year and a half into my first-ever relationship with a woman. Several months in, my fatal relationship flaw appeared on schedule: I started to become completely uninterested in sex with my very loving girlfriend.
So, I have been mulling over the idea of “treating” my husband to a threesome for our 10-year anniversary. He has told me a few times that his fantasy has always been to have a threesome and that he would love to try it with me and another girl of MY choosing.
My entire life men have never taken me seriously or loved me but have instead given me crass sexual come-ons and treated me in a derogatory and sexual-only way.
I’m a woman who’s always been in hetero-paired relationships, but lately, the idea of dating a woman has felt more like something I might want.
I’m writing to let you know I’m officially done with men and dating. I’ve taken myself off the market because dating makes me lose my f**king mind. All the horrible experiences I’ve endured with men have taken a toll on my self-esteem and now non-existent sex drive. I don’t feel safe with men anymore. Where do I go from here?
I’m hoping you can help but I know this is a lot to ask for—my life is generally falling apart. My long-term relationship of five years is dwindling into dust, my career is non-existent and I’m scarred from a puzzling childhood. However, I’m not in a position to afford weekly therapy that is clearly much needed. Do you have any tips or know of any resources?
My relationship with my mother is…complicated. I haven’t spoken to her in several years due to it being toxic and painful. I always feel super weird around Mother’s Day and I don’t really know what to do about it. I know it’s just another day and I should just ignore it, but I can’t seem to.
In the past year, I’ve been “ghosted” twice. I’ll hang out with a person for a few months and everything seems to be going fine, and then all of a sudden they cut contact with me completely.
Dating has become really frustrating for me. I’ve noticed that I inadvertently push everyone away with each successive relationship I find myself in and I’m more and more closed off.
Recently I was called a narcissist by an ex. Normally, being labeled by someone who lacks credentials in any field of psychology has very little bearing on how I live my life. However, this one was different.
After years and years of confusion and questioning and soul-searching, I’ve finally admitted to myself that I am asexual (or at least gray-/demi-). This realization has brought me a lot of peace and overwhelming relief. All well and good.
My teenage son has begun questioning his sexual orientation and gender identity and has now become very depressed. I tell him that I love and support him no matter what, but I don’t know what else I can do. Any advice would be appreciated.
I have to stop using hormonal birth control for health reasons, but my boyfriend and I have never really used condoms so I don’t know where to start.
My mom passed away five months ago. My dad who was married to her for 25+ years has already started dating. If you could shed some insight on why he could have possibly moved on this fast, I would really appreciate it.
My partner and I are in an open relationship, but every time I want to exercise that openness my partner gets hurt so I generally just don’t act. Is there a better way to deal with this without sacrificing?
Over the past few months, my love life has become a spiritually taxing train wreck. I suspect that I’d greatly improve my success in romantic relationships and my overall emotional health by taking a deliberate break from dating to tend to my personal development.
I recently ended a four month thing with a guy who I was just dating. We saw each other at least once a week, though there were “off” weeks on occasion as we are busy adults with lives.
“If we continue to smile politely behind our closed mouths, we risk living in a society in which such hatred becomes the norm.”
From the desk of Shannon Dawn, your Lowbrow Librarian — Broad Topics from a Topical Broad
From the desk of Shannon Dawn, your Lowbrow Librarian — Broad Topics from a Topical Broad